Somebody Should Have Said Something

Our women's Bible study is doing a series this summer called "Somebody Should Have Said Something." Each week 2 women speak on 2 independent topics of something they wish someone had told them...or something they wish they would have just listened to. One of the topics this week was about marriage and I am reflecting on it here because I want to be able to go back and read it again, and again, and again. This is something I needed to hear and take heart.

The topic was on marriage, and that marriage is NOT the ultimate fulfillment. Isn't that what society makes it out to be? Society sometimes defines people by their marital status. Before sin enters the world back in Genesis, all of our desires were towards God. Then, Adam and Eve's sin enters and God says to the woman:

"I will greatly increase your pain in childbearing;
with pain you will give birth to children.
Your desire will be for your husband,
and he will rule over you." -Genesis 3:16

Focusing on, "your desire will be for your husband"...now women want men to meet all their needs instead of giving that to God. The speaker gave an example from society. When women dress in a way to attract men, she is asking for men she does not even know to meet her need of getting attention and affirmation based on her dress. Makes sense, right?

Our needs are not wrong, but who we expect to meet those needs are sometimes wrong. We are not defined by whether we are married or single. We are defined as one of HIS. Husbands cannot love us like God does, so let your husband off the hook! Strong women are those who find their identities in Christ.

She also made a great reference to two women of the Bible, Rachel and Hannah. Both were barren, but Rachel goes to her husband and demands a child. Hannah goes to God. Let us be imitators of Hannah and not Rachel.

I needed this because I have always set very high expectations for not just myself, but for Rob. I need to "let him off the hook" and realize he is human. More than this, I need to hear this because I am a worrier. I worry that something will happen to Rob. Then I would be without him. But instead of imagining what could happen, I need to be back in the present time, taking refuge in God, and realizing that my identity is not in Rob, or being married to Rob. My identity is in Him.